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Was life always this complicated? Or am I starting to live only now? In the past, the choices I made could be answerable by a yes or a no, a whatever or a maybe. But now, there are things I have to think about. Like, what should I do? Should I make the first move? What are his intentions? Should I wait? Is it really over? Can they understand me? What do they think of me?

Yesterday was a dream. A vivid dream that I can fully remember. I met someone and I knew I could not have fun with him without being attached afterwards. But  I did, we talked and played and teased each other and now, I do not know what to do. I want to get to know him more but I do not want to feel rejection. They say that if you never try, you will never know. I want to try but I'm just too scared to know. After more or less than 6 years of security, I now know that this is life. It does not come with questions I could easily answer. It comes with happiness, fun, sadness, and rejection.

...and you hold me like you know me, like you understand me. And even if I say don't, you know I like you and I'd want to do it again if only with you.


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